Before I started watching YouTube cookery shows, I watched cookery programmes on TV, mainly while having my lunch or dinner. For someone who never watched/s a TV serial in her life, that was a first. It was over ten years ago. Since then, the number of cookery channels on YouTube have proliferated and given me a more convenient option.  

It was out of necessity that I started watching these shows. You see, after cooking for more than half a century, sometimes I find my own cooking too uninteresting, and need some external stimulus to help me down the food. Oh, I know dieticians warn us about not having distractions while eating, but I guess it is for children, not an old woman.

Anyway, I watch them for other reasons too. I follow vegetarian channels in several Indian languages, which not only help me learn authentic recipes but also the languages they are made in, so what if they are just food and cookery? I also watch some foreign vegan channels. Vegan, because they are safer, since theirs, and our definition of the term ‘vegetarian’ differs vastly. (‘Not even fish or chicken? They are not meat,’ they argue.) For the record, I don’t like watching any #MasterChef shows. They are way too lengthy and full of drama.

Coming to the heading of this post, it was quite by accident that I found cookery videos to be an excellent aid for insomnia. Yeah, you heard right. Read on to find out how.

Some years back, when I was struggling with insomnia, I tried everything, from reading, writing and playing music that is supposed to help you sleep. While reading and writing – both on the computer, only made me wider awake and gave me a headache to boot, the sleep music didn’t work at all.

One night, tossing and turning, I opened YouTube on my phone and scrolled to a recipe video. The host’s voice was not grating and the kitchen was simple. And the best thing was, she was not a noisy cook. (I will come to that later). And before I knew it, I had dozed off, the phone having slipped from my hand, still on. It was like magic, especially since I never watch long videos, cookery or otherwise. That means I used to zonk off within the first couple of minutes! Incredible, wouldn’t you say? I bet no sleeping aid, including sleeping pills could be so effective!

Come to think of it, it is a darn sight better than listening to spiritual discourses to fall asleep! I feel it is disrespectful to those delivering them as also being too lengthy. Then there are the white/brown/pink noises that help many to fall asleep. But my discovery is unique. I hope YouTube pays me royalty when it picks up my idea.

But I have some major peeves about many cookery videos! Call me a grammar nazi, but I can’t think of eating something that has been beaten with a ‘whisker’ now, can you? I am also not fan of something that has ‘no sugar, no flour, no butter, no milk, no this and no that.’ What is the point in eating a sweet without sugar and ghee or even milk? Or an ice cream that has no cream, for heaven’s sake? They use oats, makhana, phalana-dimkana and worse. After all, I don’t eat sweets every day or even frequently, so want to eat a proper sweet, health be damned. Also, I don’t want a ‘no-cream’, ‘no-butter’ dal makhani or a ‘healthy’ version of paneer butter masala. I’d rather eat it once a year, but when I do, I want the whole works!

Then there is the ASMR (Autonomous Sensory Meridian Response) cooking and eating, which is all the rage, especially mukbang. While ASMR has scores of fans, many like me abhor these sounds. There is a psychological term for this condition – misophonia, which is classified as a “‘disorder’ characterized by a decreased tolerance to specific sounds, or “triggers.” But of course, if the said sounds included chomping, slurping or expectorating. Ugh!

I find extraneous sounds very disruptive. For instance, the very first thing I do when I get a new phone is to disable all sounds, including keyboard clicks – all except the phone ringtone. I hate the sound of slap-slapping house-slippers, and a squeaky door hinge has me running with a can of lubricant to silence it. Is it any wonder then, that I can’t stand any kind of ASMR, never mind that I am supposed to have a “disorder” and am a misophonic. It is for this reason that I am not giving links to any of those disgusting videos. Go and search if you like!

While ASMR eating is undoubtedly revolting and disgusting in the extreme, it is ASMR cooking that riles me up even more, especially since I use cookery videos as a sleep aid. All the weird sounds of the cooking equipment and the noisy chopping, stirring and pushing and pulling of vessels and assorted stuff can be pretty disruptive when you are trying to sleep! And the worst part is, many of them do not even call it ASMR cooking, but go on to be super noisy. So you jump up just as you start dozing, when the spatula suddenly goes ting-tong in the kadhai. I think this is a sue-worthy point for insomniacs, don’t you?

Let me close on that note, and, here is a warning: This is the first post of my Random Ramblings series, which will appear — at random intervals naturally! 

https://www.telegraphindia.com/ https://www.youtube.com/ https://www.taste.com.au/