She is the (wo)man!

I have been tagged by Chinkurli and Varsh and I am supposed to list ten things that make me a Sinner Against Gender Stereotypes (SAGS).

Here goes my list.

1. I love broadcasting my age; not for me trying to look and act decades younger. I was in my thirties when I became a great aunt and I insisted on my grand nieces and nephews calling me ‘Paati’ (grandma)! I am highly amused when women at least a decade older than me call me ‘aunty’. I sometimes refer to them as ‘beta’ to make them feel even younger: D: D

2. I am not the typical house-proud housewife. Not for me the white glove tests or a clutter-free house. I am a great one for ‘preventive housekeeping’ – I try to make as little mess as possible while cooking or doing other chores so that it takes less time cleaning it up. I have had some help from my brats and L&M in this. (The day I climbed the wall) The good thing about this is that guests to my house needn’t watch their step or agonize over crumpling the cushion on the immaculately appointed sofa!

3. I don’t conform to the stereotype of a sacrificing mother, who gives even her share of goodies to the kids, wait till they finish eating and eat whatever is leftover.  God forbid! I used to fight (still do) for my fair share of these, much to the chagrin of the brats! I have often been told off by other women appalled at my behaviour, for being such a ‘selfish’ mother! Who cares, as long as I get my scoop of ice-cream or an extra doughnut!

4. Not for me romantic novels and movies. I have never read M&B except the odd one to see what it contained that made girls in my class have furious fights over who got to read it first. There was this girl who had a seemingly inexhaustible stock of them and treated like royalty for supplying the fix to the girls! J I read Alistair Maclean, Ludlum, Leon Uris and the like. Needless to say, no one fought over my books which was a relief!

5. I hate shopping as a pastime. If I go to buy something I buy it and come back. No lingering in shop windows, impulse shopping or mall hopping for me. I don’t ask for a Rs.5000 sari if I am intending to buy a Rs.500 one or vice versa, just to get an ‘idea’ – of what, I wonder!? In fact, the L&M is a ‘shopper’ in that sense. He takes more time to buy a shirt than it takes me to shop for the entire family!

6. I am not a ‘serial’ woman. I have never and I mean never watched a single serial be it the ‘saas-bahu’ ones or the so called ‘social awareness’ serials that are all the rage today! Not even Indian Idol, which should make me a sinner many times over!

7. Women are supposed to hold on to their sons. Nah! I learnt to let go of them when they took their first tottering steps. Today I am happy to be more in their lives than I would have been had I been a constant presence. 🙂

8. I have always hated silks, jari and jewellery. I must have been one of the few women (or the only one??) who didn’t shop for her wedding jewellery and trousseau! I wear the bare minimum of jewellery, even while attending weddings and functions. And I hate making up, but this seems to be on almost everyone’s list! When my sis-in-law wanted me to apply lipstick during my wedding reception, I refused, but seeing her crestfallen face, relented. She carefully applied it but the moment her back turned, I promptly ate it all up! It tasted good! When she saw what I had done, she applied some more, strictly instructing me not to repeat my act. But alas, the taste won out! Disgusted, she gave up after a few attempts! 😀

9. I am hopeless at handicrafts. Leave alone crafts, I can’t even make a paper boat, can you believe it? All mothers of my kids were adept at crafts like needlework, tailoring and stuff. And here I was, barely able to sew on buttons and mend sundry tears.

10. I don’t know if women are NOT supposed to like Rock music.  I do. Not that I would know that it is Rock when I hear it. But years of conditioning by the brats has seen to it that I have an ear for it!

While these might make me a SAGS, I wonder if we are not creating stereotypes in reverse going by the ‘modern stereotypes’ that are emerging.

And oh, I like to cook, watch kids’ movies and those featuring kids, like new clothes, perfume and footwear and I adore Sean Connery and Nicholas Cage!  🙂 So I guess I’m really not SAGS, or am I, IHM?

19 comments

  1. Sinner alright .. your hate list is very much like mine and I too never hide my age. 😉 .. growing old gracefully it’s called.

    Loved the list .

    Rock on !!! 🙂 Hugs

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    1. Just as I sin, I also am very much a sterotyped woman in many respects. We are all part of this and that, aren’t we?

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  2. shilpa · · Reply

    Loved this post Mami…
    Now I absolutely detest shopping for clothes and HRH shares my passion to the chagrin of my mother in law. I think its awesome that you as well as Amma knew better and let go of us and learn things. I know we are better people because of that.
    The lipstick story made me laugh :D..but I do remember you being stylish with your airhostess style bun, lipstick and sleeveless blouse..you looked very pretty.

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    1. Poor MIL! When you let go, you also give yourself the freedom that your kids get. Holding on is binding on both and counterproductive 🙂 We care no less than the holding-on moms, but we do it in a non-intrusive way!

      Oh yes, the brief period when I tried to conform and found it too much of an effort! You can look good if you are confident of yourself, no matter what you wear 🙂

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  3. Very interesting… I hate shopping just for the fun of it, I only go if and when I need stuff.

    But I still can’t get over it if someone calls me aunty 😀 SIgh, I need to grow up 😀

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    1. 🙂 as I mentioned, it makes those who address you as aunty feel younger! the poor things!

      I really can’t understand the women/men who just shop for the fun of it or to beat a bad mood. THAT is guaranteed to make you buy unnecessary stuff and waste money!

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  4. So the brat knows you pretty well indeed. The seventh point, i can vouch for that. Not many moms call their sons Kacchar, Donkey… hehehe.

    Nice one mom. You are grade A – OK.

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    1. ha ha. But wait, I only called you khacchar since you were so mulish! I am glad you acknowledge the seventh point…:)

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  5. Interesting post …loved it 😛

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    1. Thank you for visiting Ravindra Rajput. Thanks for the nice comment too 🙂

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  6. Very interesting list Cyber nag 🙂 I feel being a SAGS means you just be yourself, confirming to no stereotypes. If newer stereotypes are created those need not to be allowed to rule one’s choices either.

    A lot of women seem to dislike uncomfortable clothing and make up in everyday life – and a lot of us love to dress up, there are no rights or wrongs I feel everybody should be allowed to be themselves. Now with changing times, women do have choices other than the nightie/maxi/gown in the hot Indian weather, if they don’t wish to wear a sari.
    2, 3, 4, ,5, 6, 7 … we have so much in common we can be considered Sister in Sin 🙂

    I admire you for the 1st one – I am not generally bothered if something thinks I am older or younger – or calls me aunty or didi or bhabhiji (my new maids in Delhi do that) – but I do try to remain interested in looking reasonably well groomed (not easy, because natural inclination is lacking).

    And 8th is really funny 🙂 That was smart – although I love lipsticks and kajal, I hate coloured eye pencils so I can understand how you feel 🙂 I would have wiped away anything I didn’t want too 🙂 You were a sinner then and are a sinner today 🙂 Hats off to you, because it takes courage to be oneself.

    You are invited to join other sinners
    just like yourself here
    🙂

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    1. Welcome here IHM and thanks for the exhaustive comment! I loved it 🙂

      Both the sexes have some trait of the other, which is what the Ardhnareeswara figure symbolises. In some women the masculine traits are predominant and vice versa. Which is why we are all SAGS in some way or the other!

      It has not been easy being a sinner, believe me. I used to be referred to as a ‘man’ by my disgusted mother for being like I was!

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  7. Point 10… rock?? rock!! oh that the music rock… i was wondering why do u like a plain looking hard rock.. 😀

    ah… if u can be a great mom like this, i ll make a great mom sometime too then.. sigh now i can rest assured, i was wonderingif my future children ll call me Dad or mom.. 😀

    psst: did u know Lipstick is made of Fish scales.. hahhahahahaha 😀

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    1. LOL Dad or mum? That’s vintage Ratzzz 😀

      I am sorry about the rock mix up. I love THOSE rocks too! A post coming up soon on that!

      Fish scales? Ugh….pliss, pliss say it is not true…

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  8. Your sins make you the coolest Mom and Grand Mom I know!! 😀 😀

    No sharing your share of food…liking Rock…and most of all not fretting over misplaced cushions or a little bit of litter here and there…great!! 🙂
    I hate serials and romantic novels too…and hope that when I have to, I’ll learn letting go of my son easily..will come to you for advice for that 😀

    Great list! I knew yours would definitely be an interesting one 🙂 😛

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    1. Thanks Varsha. Beating the stereotype is basically doing what you want to do and feel happy about it, isn’t it? Letting go is a lot easier than it is thought to be! Another hyped up notion! 🙂

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  9. waiting for your list LP!

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  10. nice..interesting stuff. I too like some feminine stuff…am tagged to write this as well…will do it soon 🙂

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